In a personal column published via Her Campus at UC Berkeley, a student writer explores the unexpected comfort found in spending time alone while maintaining an extroverted lifestyle. The essay details the author’s transition from avoiding solitary outings to embracing independent routines, such as visiting campus cafes for matcha without company.
From Constant Socializing to Independent Campus Outings
For an individual who describes herself as someone who loves talking, meeting new people, and turning brief interactions into lengthy conversations, the concept of doing activities alone initially felt foreign. The author notes that previously, routine tasks like grabbing food, shopping, or buying matcha required coordinating with friends. If no companion was available, the outing was often abandoned.
This behavior stemmed from an unconscious association between being alone and being lonely, which the author mistakenly linked to a personal failing. College life amplified this dynamic. Surrounded by constant opportunities to study, eat, and socialize with peers, the author initially leaned entirely into the high-energy environment typical of a university campus.
Shifting Perspectives on Solitude at UC Berkeley
Realizing that constant social engagement made it easy to lose touch with oneself, the author began taking small steps toward independence. These changes included walking across the UC Berkeley campus with headphones on and purchasing matcha between classes without seeking company first.
Initial attempts at solitude brought self-consciousness, with the writer feeling as though other patrons in local coffee shops were scrutinizing her solo presence. However, that anxiety quickly faded as she realized customers were indifferent to her seating arrangements. Over time, those brief moments of independence transformed into an appreciated sense of freedom, allowing her to alter plans spontaneously or listen to the same song repeatedly without coordination.
Future Academic Years and Maintaining Balance
Reflecting on her early experiences at college, the author concludes that she does not need to choose permanently between constant companionship and complete isolation. Instead, she plans to balance her love for spontaneous social plans with quiet moments spent in her own company over the remainder of her university career.
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